Yaya Diaries: Calling their attention

Thursday, August 07, 2014

Is there a clear cut way how reprimand helpers?
(Note:  My Yayas are all okay, thank goodness!)

I've tried it all, I think.  I took time to explain to them but nothing works.  It seems nowadays that when you call their attention on something - ikaw pa yung masama.  To be honest, I have kept one eye shut - because I know they're not perfect, so I give them chances.  But when I see that nothing is improving, I make it a point to tell them.  But it always backfires.

Is it wrong to call their attention on something that they did wrong?  Because all the helpers that I've dealt with (with an exception of a few) would feel that it was the end of the world when I call them on it.  They feel like they're being accused of something they didn't do!

Take for instance - yesterday, we had no water.  So I told the helper to get use the water for washing dishes from the balde where we kept water (for emergencies - this water is replenished every 2 days to keep it fresh).  I knew that we had water in the tank - I instructed her to do that so people in the house can shower.  But she didn't understand it.  I think she didn't get the logic of why I needed her to use the tabo system for cleaning dishes, so she ignored my instruction and still used the faucet.  When I saw this, I called her attention!  It turns out, she didn't understand what I meant (feeling ko, nagets niya pero ayaw lang niya gawin).  She then turns to me and says 'Ma'am eh ubos na yung tubig sa balde' I go to the clean kitchen and see a water jug (with faucet, the blue one?) filled with water - so I pointed it to her and said 'Ano yan?' and she obliged.  With this helper, I've called her attention so very few times in the past two months.  I like her, in fact of all the helpers that I have - I think she's the smartest.  She gets instructions fast and she works efficiently.  But something has changed.

This morning - while she was moping our bedroom floor, I noticed that she was moving a certain object, mop it, put it back, move the object beside it, mop it and put it back.  I then suggested to her - why not move all the objects/items all together so you can mop it properly and put it back again?  She did it with ease, but then when it came to putting the stuff back - gosh, she forgot where to put everything and was having a hard time fitting everything in.  Sigh.  Ayoko na, suko na ako.  I then felt that something might be up, so I asked her if there was something wrong or if she had a problem - because I knew from experience that when they're 'problematic' they slack off and are semi delirious she then tells me 'Ma'am hanggang sa 23 nalang po ako, kasi po pinapauwi na po ako ng magulang ko, may magpapa-aral po sa akin' - I knew it was baloney.  But she stuck to her story, telling me that she received a text yesterday that her parents wanted her to go home to study.  And this morning, they confirmed it.  Really now?  I asked her when she would be studying - she answered me with 'Sa Summer po'  Summer?  Was she aware of what she was saying?  She insisted Summer - I asked her when Summer was and she said October.  Sigh.. I knew that Second Semester starts in November and Not October - October is for sem break right?  (or am I wrong?  Please correct me if I'm wrong)  But them I am one who doesn't force the issue.  If you don't want to work for me, then so be it.  I will not force you to work if you're unhappy with me and the workload.  So I told her it's okay.

In the car, I was talking to her aunt (she's Connor's yaya) and she told me that last night after I reprimanded her niece, her niece was all emoting and cried!  She said that I was being unreasonable and that she wanted to leave.  So I asked Yaya Belen if the reason of 'studying' was true - she said that it wasn't, based on what they talked about the night before.  If there was a studying issue - she wasn't aware that there was any.

Sigh.  So there, I am again on a look out for a helper.  I hope she stays though because she works very well  with the Yayas.  She's also smart enough to follow instructions.  Its just that after her day off - well, she was kinda - off, she seemed different.  Lutang, she was very lutang.  I think that's one of the problems - when you get to your relative's place you will be talked out of leaving your current employment, people will make you see the negative.  I guess, it's really up to the helpers to discern what the right thing to do is.

Oh well, that's life!

I spoke to her again and she really wanted to study.  I admire her for that but I hope that she sustains it.  I was asking her what course she wanted to take - and she said computer.  I wish her well.  I told her that if her studying doesn't pan out, she knows how to reach me.

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