the canDIshhh tales

I think it was instilled in me while growing up that it was ideal to have a loving family.  But being Chinese - well, it wasn't as evident as one that you would see in a 'normal' family.  When I say normal, I refer to those we see on TV and in the people we encounter.  I know it's quite silly to refer to the boobtube - but seriously, it was where I saw families loving each other the most.  It was very ideal, but in reality - I think as much as we would like things to be 'loving' there are so many things that get in the way. My parents were never affectionate, as most Chinese parents are.  They never told me 'I love you' nor did they hug me.  I knew they were very proud of me but they never said it to me.  I think I was hungry for those words of affirmation - but I never got them.  Instead, what I got were not so positive words.  I realized now that they were doing the reverse psychology thing on me.  And I have to say - there were pr...

Ahh, the age old tale of helpers.. I've written my fair share of up and mostly down on this blog. Can't live with them, can't live without them. So when I was invited to another #BetterMe session with Coach Pia - I knew I had to attend.  I wanted to learn and have some insights. You see, I was beginning to doubt myself when it comes to my relationship with my helpers. I can't seem to find an all around helper that stays and is competent. I was beginning to think that, maybe it was me. But then again, how come my yayas have stayed with me. Again, this session enlightened me so much. And these are what I took home: (they are in no particular order) Consider the birth order of your helper I honestly never thought about this.  I would not consider this important but it is quite a relevant matter. Coach Pia said that depending on the birth order - you would be able to gauge the capacity of your helper. Let's say for a first born, most often than not, th...

I love listening to Coach Pia speak.  It seems like she's the life troubleshooter!  I honestly feels like she has all the answers in the world when it comes to relationships.  And I will be forever thankful to these sessions to Kris.  I owe you big time! The session was all about building your kid's self esteem.  I honestly did not think that these kids need some ego boosting - but I was wrong.  I then realized that when I was younger, whenever my parents (and elders) dismissed what I was feeling at that time - I felt so bad.  It was as if what I was feeling wasn't real - well, it wasn't as affecting to the adults, but at that time - it was affecting me.  I guess as I grew older, the dismissed feelings were more of the norm for me.   The session opened my mind and heart to the reality that words are so powerful in rearing our kids.  I grew up with traditional parents who saw talking about their feelings as a weakn...

I am honored ( and kilig ) to have been invited by Kris of OC Mom in Manila to join them in their BetterMe sessions with Coach Pia a few weeks ago. The session was all about The Art of Co-Parenting:  Raising a Child as a Team. This was very timely for me - as I am a fairly new mom (Kailee just turned 2.5yo) and raising her, well - challenges me and my Panget a lot.  We actually never discussed the specifics but we agreed on the 'good cop/bad cop' set up, and so far, we haven't had any situation that called for it.  Kailee has been good so far, I mean yeah - she would have her tantrums once in a while, but it wasn't something of a big issue for us. While listening to Coach Pia speak and share, I realized so many things about myself and my background.  My background as it turns out, has a big influence on how I have decided to raise my kids.  What I have been accustomed to - well, that doesn't necessarily translate into the right way or method.  An...